Susie Homemaker... Or Something?

So, in just less than a month, we are going to be moving into our very first house. Neither of us has ever bought a house before and I'm here to tell you that it is terrifying. Not only that but it tends to be stressful and for those of you who are emotionally differently-abled, it's a wild ride for not only you but for anyone around you. I can tell you that I have already cried on three separate occasions today alone. Each cry was fueled by a different emotion. 

First, a cry because I was sad that we were leaving our very first "home" together. It's nothing special. It's just a dinky little two-bedroom apartment. Number 1707. A number that will be burned into my memory for all eternity. For no other reason then that this was my first home with my real family. This was where we brought Tobe home two months after we moved in. Then Skyler a year and some change after that. We had two Christmases, two Thanksgivings, two New Years and two birthdays here. To the normal person, it's nothing special but it is special. 

My second cry was due to frustration. A lot of paperwork (and legwork, if you will) goes into house-hunting/buying. It's exhausting. It's scary. And the realization that we're moving in less than a month and have so much to do and I'm going to put myself in the position to need to work AND go to school AND move, just seemed a little overwhelming at the time. Plus again, emotionally stunted. <See Loon.>

Finally, I cried because I was happy. We went to go visit our house today (the sellers are very nice folks) and I finally pictured it. Our house. Where everything would go, our children running up and down the stairs like the noisy little hellions they are. I pictured the kids playing with a dog out back, although I'm not entirely sure why considering I have no desire to purchase or train a dog anytime in the near future. I pictured Zach working in the workshop with the boys (and Skyler because she can do whatever the hell she wants) and the doctor's bills that might incur. I realized that we finally did it. We are where we both wanted to be at this age-- or potentially five years ago. Maybe we got there in an insanely roundabout way but since when have either of us played by the rules? 

The moral of the story is that you don't always go down the beaten path but one way or another you will either a) make it where you wanted to be or b) make it to the destination that that path was meant to take you to or c) the beaten path will drop you off in front of a mansion that is filled with transvestites and you will sing silly songs with Meatloaf.

Congratulations, me. You finally grew up.