Thursday, February 27, 2014

So... I Started Therapy

And my therapist is a-fucking-mazing. Obviously, I'm not going to put down who I see but I can tell you a little bit about him. He reminds me a lot of what my dad would look like if he hadn't turned into a cynical and cranky older man and he cursed like a sailor. This guy is most assuredly a perfect match for me. Only took me 27.5 years!

We covered my immediate family and he asked me to tell him my major traumatic moments in life... and we covered the ones that have had a big effect on me. I didn't bring up the rape right now because it's something I'm not sure how to express. I feel let down from the system and it makes me nervous to share that with anyone else. After all, pretty much everyone thought I was lying or got what I deserved anyways. That's what you get when you are a dumb 17 year old who does drugs and drinks.

Anyways, I have a good feeling about this. Let's hope that that trend continues. :)

And It Begins... (Brain Movie)

For starters, I'd like to mention that we recently had to move out of our apartment and in with my grandmother. It's not the best of developments, so let's suffice it to say that the mortgage fell through the day before we were to close and we had already given our notice to move so, what was one to do? However, our first night at my grandmother's and I had awful nightmares. So, for the sake of my brain's cinematography expertise, I feel the need to share it. (Hopefully, I will remember after I get my monkey to school.) I am also going to write this in the form that my dream took, which was cinematic. Bear with me.

The camera comes in to focus on three homeless men, standing around a cliche trashcan fire. One is warming their hands above it, one has his hands stuffed in his pockets and is jumping up and down, the third is just standing there silently and staring at the fire. The man that is warming his hands is talking about nothing in particular and the two men on each side of him look at him as he speaks. It slowly pans towards the individual talking, until his face is centered. When it goes wide-shot again, there are three new individuals standing directly in front of the original three. They are disheveled much like the homeless man, covered in dirt and grime and their faces are hard to discern.

"Oh, shit! Damn, gentlemen, you scared us," says the man who will now be referred to as Homeless Man #1.

None of them say anything but an upbeat, carefree tune lifts into the air. The three newest fellows begin to move their heads in a rhythm similar to when a dog is investigating with his nose, although nary a sound comes from them. 

"Jesus... guys, do you smell this? They smell worse than we do," says Homeless Man #1, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"Is that possible?" says Homeless Man #2.

The "Blue Man Group" (because it's getting frustrating to describe them as "the newest group") begin to focus in a little more vigorously on the men in front of them. They look confused with their noses sniffing in the air but eventually seem to give up and turn to leave. When they turn, you can see that one of the group is wearing a dirty letter man jacket. You can tell that it used to be bright red but is now dingy and grey. 

"Wait, aren't you Stike Ray?!" Homeless Man #1 asks in alarm. As he does, the music fades instantly. We focus in on the boy in the letter men jacket. You can see his eyes are unnatural and golden yellow. His forehead creases in confusion, like he is trying to remember something. 

"Wha...wha... what did you say?" the boy says, as if a memory has sparked in his head. For a moment, his eyes look merry and happy. Then his eyes fade back into a lifeless glaze. He turns back around towards the men and starts in on them. The camera fades out so you can see only the shadows and all you see is the Blue Man Group descending on the homeless men and eating them.

Fin.

(I'd like to clarify that anyone shown to use the above in any way that has not been accepted through me, is liable for damages.)

Not that anyone would want to... but if they did, by golly, I'm going to stab a bitch.